Dear friends,
I have neglected this correspondence for some time now! That was not my intention, I just didn't have time to write with the kind of semester I had. It's over now (hallelujah!) and I can focus on more important things again. Like keeping in touch with the people I care about!
I wrote the following around March, I believe, but didn't post it 'cause it just didn't come out exactly like I wanted it to. But rediscovering it today, I think it expresses well enough what I'm trying to say. I hope there are some out there who can relate to me on this subject! I pity the person who does not know the joy of a hymn.
"I have always loved hymns.
Hymns are Sunday mornings; the golden sunshine shining through the church windows. They are healing, and they are very much a part of me. For as long as I can remember, hymns have been my favorite kind of song. I pretty much enjoy any kind of music, especially the music that brings me closer to God. But it seems no other music will draw me nearer, still nearer to Him than the hymns I have known since before I was born.
Life is full of ups and downs. During the downs, hymns have always been my solace, my comfort, my knowledge that God is real and taking care of me. "Abide With Me" can make silent tears stream down my face in times of trial, but there is real comfort in the beautiful words and music. During the ups, it is hymns that quiet my exuberant spirit, and remind me that there is so much more to life than living for myself and pleasure. The music takes my exuberance and cultivates it into pure joy of being alive and living for God. Just a closer walk with Thee... Grant it, Jesus, is my plea.
I confess I haven't been as strong spiritually as I need to be and want to be in recent months. It bothers me to feel like I am drifting. Not away from God, but not toward Him either. Just drifting. So distracted by the cares of life. School and work have been my only focus since January, and my spiritual self has suffered. It's taken me this long to realize how starved I am. Isn't that how it is, though? Our focus on one thing blinds us to all else. Then you wake up one day and realize part of you, the part you've neglected, is hurting.
Then tonight, as I was laying in bed, the old hymns started coming back to me. "Abide with me, fast falls the eventide, the darkness deepens, Lord with me abide..." I can sing only one part, but my mind and heart sang the others; the moving alto and tenor, the solid bass. In that moment, I felt again the reality of God. There is a God, He is alive. Abide with me, Lord, even when I fail you. Don't give up on me.
I am ashamed of my lack of spiritual growth. I am thankful for music bringing me back when I stray.
No words can express the power of music. Music cannot be explained; it must be felt with the heart and soul. So often the old familiar strains of "Blessed Assurance" and "In the Sweet By and By" have been the motivation to change, to grow, to press on. I have so many wonderful memories from growing up with the congregation in Goshen, Ohio, but none sweeter to me than the Sunday mornings when the sunbeams shone brilliantly through the windows while the congregation sang in perfect harmony, "Be still and know that I am God..." And Grandpa Brown would pray his familiar prayer "...We thank thee for this-a-nother Lord's day..." When I sing those hymns, I am taken back there, to my roots, and my heart is filled with childlike purity.
Of all of God's gifts to the human race, music is among my most favorites. I absolutely cannot wait to sing praise to God with the angels! Heaven will surely be worth it all!"
I'll be writing again soon. I have a (hopefully) funny story to share about a moment of shame I experienced recently.
Take care!
Much love,
Elizabeth
